Reality Fantasy

In movies and TV a common humor gag is a man having an unrealistic sexual fantasy about a woman he's turned on by. Often the fantasy involves an odd scenario and costumes and occasionally the fantasy is about a celebrity who makes a cameo for the scene. 

I have no idea how realistic such portrayals are. I've talked with a few dozen queer guys about sexual fantasies but most of theirs tended to be about things they'd like to do. Whether guys really do imagine [current hot star name here] as a half naked angel hovering above the bed I don't know. What I definitely know is even in my wildest sexual fantasies I have to keep my feet on the ground or I can't get turned on. 

As an adult I've never been able to fantasize about sex with a celebrity or fantastical being. In order to turn me on my fantasies have to be realistic. I can imagine I'm at an orgy, but it can't be an orgy of super hot guys if I'm going to be able to get off because in real life the only way my unattractive middle aged ass would be at an orgy of good looking young guys is if I were a millionaire and I'd paid them all to be there. Imagining an orgy of middle aged bear guys works just fine.

When I see an out-of-my-league guy in every day life I might ponder what he looks like naked and possibly what it would be like to touch him all over, but I can't imagine having sex with him. I can, however, imagine another guy having sex with him, even from a first person perspective. But the other character is never me.

Even if I'm fantasizing about a guy I completely made up the guy has to be a guy I could realistically hook up with and the scenario has to be reality based.

My lack of being able to fantasize about whoever and wherever is a bit funny as I'm a fairly imaginative person. It would seem the world should be my sexual fantasy playground. But despite my high flying mind, my libido is firmly planted on the ground. 

To complicate matters, my fantasies usually have to have a back story. I can't just jump into the act or even do the porn movie thing where eyes meet = clothes fall off. Instead I need to have an elaborate reason as to how I ended up sharing a bed with another guy (who is my age and has a body that matches his age), and then there's the conversation that leads to then discovery that we're both into each other. Finally, eyes meet, clothes fall off, porn music soundtrack kicks in. 

Fortunately I don't always require such time consuming contemplations just to get off. A still photo or a recollection of an actual encounter, no backstory needed, can work just fine.